Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Reality Bites

Yep, it sure does.  As many of you know we are gearing up for yet another deployment in our household.  We've all been putting off the inevitable, but there is only so long you can put things on hold.  The fact of the matter is that packing has to happen.  We have to get power of attorneys and other legal things sorted.  I have to finish that hat I promised I would knit for deployment.  I've been putting off closing it up since the road trip.  It's one of those weird reminders that soon we will be without one of our family members.   Maybe if I don't finish it he won't leave?  The Marine Corps is just laughing at me now! 

Despite the state of denial I've been living in this deployment will happen.  I find that for some reason I'm having a harder time dealing with this deployment than in the past.  Normally I'm totally calm, cool and collected, but I feel a bit emotional this time around.  I don't know if it's different now that we have the fussbucket, or my hormones are still out of whack, but man, my eyes are full of tears at the silliest things.

To be quite honest, this whole overly emotional thing is driving us all nuts!  I know it drives my husband nuts, but it bugs me as well.  I guess I kind of pride myself on being strong and pulled together so not being "together" really stinks!  I know that we'll be fine when he's gone.  We've managed before, quite successfully, and we'll do it again.  I know that I rely on my husband a lot and appreciate all his help with the fussbucket so I will miss those little breaks.  I'll miss the banter and laughs, the hugs and kisses, but I know at the end of this challenge we'll all be stronger for it.

I struggle to find the right words to say about how I feel, even after writing this, but that seems appropriate for my state of mind.  I know that with courage, strength and a lot of prayer we'll get through this deployment.  God doesn't give us anything we can't handle.  I have to remember that as I'm overly emotional, because we can and will handle it.  And knowing that we can handle it gives me peace that I need to embark on this adventure.

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