Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Murphy's Law of Motherhood

Good old Murphy and I have always been good friends, but little did I know his law would apply to motherhood.  He is always popping up and reminding me he's around.  For instance:

1. Whenever mom sits down to eat baby will fuss.  Hence I ate ice cold eggos this morning.  Yum!

2.  As soon as you change the baby, they will soil their diaper straight away.  No wonder parents spend so much on diapers!

3.  When you sit down to feed the baby and aren't mobile, the dogs will desperately need to go outside!  But since they don't wear diapers, they win!

4.   You lay down to take a nap and the phone rings, the baby cries, the dog barks or any number of things to keep you from actually sleeping.  Sleep is overrated anyways, right?

5.  You only type with one hand because you always seem to have a baby in the other.  Because the hunt and peck method is so much more productive!

6.  Time is relative.  You think you are responding in a timely manner, but really they've been waiting on a response, that thank you note, that phone call back for way too long!  But you're worth waiting for, right?

7.  You spend a whole ten minutes getting ready in the morning/afternoon/whenever you can get a chance only to be spit up on.

8.  You double check the baby stuff ten times before leaving the house only to realize you forgot to pack your older child's pajamas, grab the dog's leash, put your wallet back in the diaper back, etc.  Preggo brain does not seem to go away and is now renamed mommy brain.

9.  You get a text inviting you to meet friends for a last minute coffee only to cringe at the sound of baby practicing for his audition for the purple crying video as you're about to leave.  No one thinks baby is cute when he's screaming his head one.

10.   You're just drifting off to dreamland when you're rudely awakened by the little one crying.  Nothing says fun like a middle of the night snack and diaper change!  (The snack is normally for the little one...normally!)

So Murphy, you've had a good run these past three weeks.  I'm sure you'll give me more reasons to remember you as Liam grows.  For now, could you take a wee break so this momma can get a little sleep in?

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